My 30-hmph Birthday

Last week, Charlie was due in Ft. Worth for a training day with his squadron. The squadron commander, Lt. Col. Sean McKenna, is a family man himself, and he makes spouses and kids feel especially welcome when the squadron gets together. I should also note that it was Lt. Col. McKenna who got me the Texas Rangers gig on the Fourth of July. He's no slouch when it comes to community and charity, either. Check out these shots from a charity event he did earlier this year.


But I digress...

This was the third year in a row in which the Air Force preempted my birthday, so I was glad at least to be able to go with Charlie to training, with our son, and stay in one of my favorite places, the Navy Lodge (clean, comfy, cheap--my three favorite c-words), visit Half-Price Books, get some fresh produce at the Farmer's Market (last month, those tomatoes lasted nearly a month!), and maybe stop in at the Ft. Worth Zoo, where we are members.

We only missed the zoo, which was okay because it's hot as hell down here and I will enjoy the zoo a whole lot more when the thermometer takes a dip, capiche?

I got three books to read, substance-less and gossipy, perfect. I got bags full of okra, tomatoes, and peaches. I've had some of all three already--delicious! And, thanks to my good friend Chris Holden who turned me on to such, we scored a big ol' rain barrel with a spigot for a hose to water our flower beds and the garden I still intend to put in. Oh, and you know those party dips that women bring to bridal luncheons and baby showers--the ones that have roasted red pepper or spinach in them? Well, there was a lady there selling those little seasoning packets at her booth, so I bought five bags of those, too. The spinach one already has the spinach in it...NO SQUEEZING/DRAINING REQUIRED!!! Sorry for the caps but this is huge for those of us who take food to these types of events. You know who you are. I've got her number if you need some. Let me know, and I'll get it to you. She says she'll happily mail some to you.

So on the day of my birthday, I mentioned to Charlie an idea I was mulling. He seized on it like crazy, and within 4 hours the deed was done. I'm keeping it to myself for a few weeks, because it's a big deal for me, and I will be visiting family soon, for Labor Day: I'd like them to know first.

Hang in there.

Suffice it to say that I have no regrets, and I think a move like this is important for those of us celebrating our 30-, 40-, 50-(and so on)hmph birthdays. Change and newness can bring freshness and improved perspective. It forces one to look at things differently. It reveals old habits that show up awkwardly, no longer necessary, never necessary at all, more than likely.

I told someone the other day that I actually like birthdays better now than I did in my twenties. Then, I was reliant on someone else to make me feel special, alive. If there was no someone there, special occasions were diminished with the pangs of loneliness. When there was a someone there, special occasions were diminished with the awareness that loneliness still lingered, beating heavily against the locked door of denial. Lonesome with can be so much worse than lonesome without.

And so I embrace the birthdays of my thirties, if not by confessed number, in the knowledge that I am better equipped now to enjoy them. I ask myself, what would you like to do for your birthday, Mollie? And I always answer honestly. This year's activity has been transformational. Right on time.

Stay tuned for a photojournal.

Just as soon as I see my sister and my momma.